The Creator's PURPOSE in Sex
It is impossible to understand the true meaning of sex without first understanding that sex and marriage are God-given and God-ordained. To leave God out of the picture — as this modern age is doing — is to degrade the marriage union to mere animalism.
Notice God's PURPOSE in creating man and woman! "And the Lord God said [after He had made only the man], It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make an help meet for him" (Gen. 2:18). God saw that man was INCOMPLETE by himself, and so He decided to make a help "meet" or suitable for the man — one with whom man could really share his life.
Then God brought all the other living creatures to Adam — and he named them. "But for Adam there was not found an help meet for him" (verse 20). There was no other creature really LIKE Adam — one who could share his sorrows and joys, his hopes and dreams.
And so God created woman out of Adam's very flesh and bone. "And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man" (verse 23).
Here now was a creature equal with Adam, another person with whom he could share EVERYTHING. And she was created to be a suitable "help" to him, and to be his wife and companion. For God said: "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (verse 24).
God made us male and female. God created SEX as a beautiful and holy thing to be used to His glory. And, as we have just seen, GOD instituted marriage — not man, or the laws or courts of man.
So the first and primary purpose of marriage is to make man and woman complete. Each is incomplete without the other. Man alone was not able to fulfill the purpose for which God created him — was not able to learn the lessons of CHARACTER which God intended — and so God created the woman as a "help" to the man. And, in the very creation, God showed that they were to dwell together as man and wife in one fleshly union — to share EVERYTHING in this life, and so make their lives meaningful and complete in a physical sense at least.
The second purpose of sex and marriage is the begettal and training of children. For God had told the man and woman: "Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth and subdue it . . ." (Gen. 1:28).
In begetting children comes the responsibility of protecting and training them. A stable, happy home and marriage are indispensable to the correct nurture and training of a child. And God commands: "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it" (Prov. 22:6).
Both parents are responsible for the supervision and training of their children. But the minute-by-minute, hour-by-hour responsibility of care and training of the children falls the lot of the wife as the God-given "helper" of her husband. The Eternal God commands that the young women are to be taught "to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, KEEPERS AT HOME, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the Word of God be not blasphemed" (Titus 2:4-5).
The Home Is a School for Character Development
The home and family is the BASIS of all decent society! The lessons of character learned in the home — patience, understanding, kindness — all these are qualities that God wants in man for all eternity, and the family relationship is one of the best places in which they can be learned!
Better than any other place, the lessons of decency, loyalty, and a sense of responsibility are learned in a happy and well-balanced home.
And so, in addition to making man complete and to the begettal and training of children, a third great purpose in sex and marriage is the building of CHARACTER in the home and family relationship. The kingdom and law of God is based on LOVE. Jesus said: "It is more blessed to GIVE than to receive" (Acts 20:35). To obey GOD'S law of marriage, man and wife must literally GIVE themselves to each other in every phase and facet of their lives.
Showing that this principle must be practiced in the sexual relationship as well as in others, the apostle Paul commanded: "Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency" (I Cor. 7:3-5).
The material act of bodily union is a debt each marriage partner owes the other. But it is a debt of LOVE and is so intimate and holy that God blesses it with a NEW LIFE.
The Divine purpose in sex attraction is to kindle love and intensify it until there is complete and mutual surrender of two lives. Love in its highest sense is union. The marriage union is of mind, heart and body. It is made sacred by God's command, for He instituted marriage to be the perfect expression of this love of man and woman.
The Attitude of TRUE LOVE
Love can be simply defined as a sense of closeness, warmth, affection and OUTGOING CONCERN for the one or ones loved. There are three basic types of love: love toward GOD, love toward fellowman, and love toward mate. In all three types of love, the individual is motivated by his concern for the OTHER more than he is concerned about himself.
This directly applies to love in marriage. You should always be diligently trying to serve your mate, to care for him or her, to honor, to give to and respect. Sex is a tool in helping learn to express this type of TRUE LOVE — as nothing else can be.
It exemplifies and epitomizes the attitude of serving and love toward the other. If this attitude is not present, there will, of course, be terrible troubles, frustrations, bitterness and misunderstanding.
But here is a rich opportunity in marriage! GROWING in true love. GROWING together as a team. Growth will not always be smooth. Growing "pains" will occur.
But these "pains" are signs of GROWTH — provided that both husband and wife are working together. The more a couple grows together — the more they LOVE each other, the more mutual concern and consideration they will have for each other and the more they share their mutual plans, hopes, dreams and joys in an ever-increasing and delightful marriage bond.
God ordained sex and marriage as a means to help us develop the true love — the outgoing concern — that we desperately need to qualify us for the ultimate positions that God has in store for all humanity who will heed! It becomes quite obvious, then, that man and woman, alone, are INCOMPLETE — they lack something. Usually, the single person will NOT have the same outgoing concern for others that a happily married couple will have learned to express. They will be set in their ways, resisting change. They will want to do things their own way — being unmalleable, unpliable and often unyielding to the desires and needs of others.
This is to be expected.
They never had the opportunity to USE God's gift of sex and marriage as the Creator intended. They never have the opportunity to SERVE a mate and children in a day-in, day-out lasting union which must be based on giving, sharing and serving.
Men and women were created with a NEED to experience and learn these lessons of the marriage union. Neither is complete without the other. But together, a Godly married couple is indeed a powerful and balanced team.
The Development of CHARACTER
Character development is the supreme GOAL of life. It is the very purpose of our physical lives. Everything else should revolve around this basic and indispensable goal. And true LOVE is the most important single characteristic of Godly character!
The wise and proper use of sex is an integral part, then, of BOTH Godly character and true love. Its proper understanding and meaningful use has a fantastic purpose extending not only through this life — but into the time beyond.
You now see the alternatives placed before you. You can plainly see the end RESULTS of the philosophies and practices of this modern world and its wretched use of the gift of sex. You see the pitiful conditions, the broken homes, the juvenile delinquency, the blindness and allied ailments caused by venereal disease, the gnawing UNHAPPINESS and the ruined lives. The wretched results of sexual lawlessness is incontrovertibly obvious.
But you need not take that way. There is a BETTER WAY!
May the true God give you the wisdom and strength to PRACTICE the understanding and principles you should have gained from this article! Reread it carefully and use it!
But we have only scratched the surface.
Because of the desperate NEED which hundreds of thousands of our readers have of knowing the real TRUTH about sex and marriage — and how to put it to work — Ambassador College has published a complete book covering this subject. This book gives detailed information and answers about the real MEANING of marriage such as none other you have ever read. It speaks out frankly and PLAINLY. It pulls no punches! It presents sex, and the PURPOSE of marriage, in its right and true perspective.
Although it is a finely printed 324-page, quality book, it is plainly marked:
"Not to be sold." There is NO PRICE — and no follow-up or obligation whatsoever. Yet every engaged couple NEEDS this book entitled: "God Speaks Out on the New Morality."
To avoid criticism and complaint, we cannot send this book to unmarried minors. So we urge teenagers to ask their parents to request a copy for them. This vital knowledge ought not to be suppressed!
If you would like to receive a copy, you must state that you are either 1) married, 2) past 21, or 3) engaged to be married with parental consent, within three months, and state the wedding date. We are willing to give this book without charge — but we do not wish to bring criticism or accusation from parents of minors. Therefore, we feel constrained to offer this valuable book only on these CONDITIONS. Just send requests to the Editor, at the address listed for you on the inside front cover of this magazine.
And while you're at it — if you want to know more about the various facets of making your marriage rich and happy, write for our fully illustrated, full-color, free booklet entitled, Your Marriage Can Be Happy! This booklet — and the fine book on the New Morality you may wish to request — will give you the "missing half" of much-needed information on sex and marriage. Use them and appreciate them!