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Be a loving king in your family kingdom

Here is a VITAL article in our series on personal development.
Here is the way to JOY, happiness and STABILITY in your home.
Here is the way to promote SUCCESS in the sons and daughters who will bear your name.


"MY son is a good boy. Why are you bothering us at this you bothering us at this hour?" the father stormed and fumed at the sheriff's officer making the call.

"Does he need some money to get out of trouble? Let me know and I'll send it along. But quit pestering us at this time of night!"


Parents Just Don't Care!

Was the father worried that his 15year-old son had been out half the night and was in trouble with the police? No. He was upset because his own drinking party and poker playing had been interrupted.

For throughout much of America, Britain and the English-speaking world, our youth are going absolutely WILD. They are mixed-up, rebellious, crazed and almost insane at times in their insatiable thirst to get more thrills and "kicks" out of life.

They have been given NO PURPOSE for life, no real training, no discipline, and precious little love, attention and interest from their parents.

Yet they are YOUR CHILDREN — or your neighbor's just down the way. They live on your street, in your city — now! They will certainly affect your future — for they are the leaders of tomorrow. And all too often — as the grisly crime statistics indicate — they are the murderers, the muggers and the rapists of today.

Increasingly, law enforcement officials have come to realize that the parents of these lawless children are often the chief culprits. A sheriff's officer said: "The real trouble here is that too many parents don't know — or don't care — where their children are at night."

In an article on juvenile drug addiction in the Reader's Digest, the authors stated: "Virtually every official we talked with emphasized that the ultimate cure for the teenage drug menace lies in the home, the neighborhood, the community. . . Lieutenant Norbert Currie, head of the San Francisco Narcotics Squad put it succinctly: 'We are never going to lick this pill and glue stuff until PARENTS really care about the youngsters.' " (Emphasis ours)

It's time parents everywhere WOKE UP!

If you are a parent, then you have a God-given RESPONSIBILITY to teach and train your children. You also have the opportunity to make your family life a thing of JOY and productivity — enriching your own life immeasurably and preparing LEADERS for the World Tomorrow!


The Abundant Life Should Be FAMILY-Centered

The great GOD of creation inspired the Psalmist to write: "Except the Lord build the house, they labor in vain that build it . . ." (Psalm 127:1). This teaches us that our homes are to be built GOD'S way, not man's way — otherwise it is "in vain."

The Psalmist continues: "Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate" (Psalm 127:3-5).

Our Creator is telling us here that children are a BLESSING — not a curse! Yet, all too often parents feel frustrated and "bothered" that they have to take time to play with, to give attention to, and to teach and train their darling children. At least those children should be "darling" if their parents have given them right attention at all! For God says the man is "happy" who has his quiver full of them.

Again, in Psalm 128:1-3, God says: "Blessed is everyone that feareth the Lord; that walketh in his ways. . . Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table."

This certainly should be an uplifting and inspiring picture! Here is the father with his lovely and submissive wife by his side, surrounded by the clean, wholesome uplifted faces of their darling children — the fruit of their bodies and of their lives. Here is pictured a miniature "kingdom" — with the father as the king and the mother as the queen over this small — but very happy and productive — kingdom.

For every family based on God's WAY should be just such a kingdom! It should have laws and a definite way of life based upon the revelation of the Creator. It should reflect a balanced, warm, dedicated and giving and serving atmosphere. It should be an extremely happy place and filled with JOY.

Jesus said: "I am come that they might have LIFE, and that they might have it more abundantly" (John 10:10). Your Bible reveals that this happy and abundant life should be centered in your family and in your home! For the most deeply joyful, peaceful, uplifting and rewarding experiences should either be experienced in your home and family life, or at least be shared deeply and fully with your wife and children in the home and family situation.

Jesus said: "A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. . . Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them" (Mat 7:18, 20).

The "fruit," the PRODUCT of your marriage and child-rearing practices certainly show up DRAMATICALLY in your children! They are the ones who display the kind of character you really are. They are the ones who are going to carry your name on in this life and, probably, into the World Tomorrow. In view of this, it certainly behooves every one of you to cultivate a balanced and happy home.

It is most important to avoid loud, jangling, discouraging family arguments. Yet in how many families do the husbands and wives fight, argue and "pick at" one another continually in front of their children? One of my close friends once cited an example of a boyhood chum who began stuttering uncontrollably during the violent quarrels his father and mother had when he was a child. This stuttering habit continued right on through his teen years, and affects this young man's personality even to this day! How deep and LASTING these hurts can be.

You need an active campaign to teach your family and children God's kind of abundant life!


Husbands and Wives Must Be a "Team"!

In bringing about the right kind of happiness, training and balance in your home, it is certainly important for the husband and wife to be completely united in their approach to this problem. Husbands and wives must learn to cooperate and get on the same "team."

Your Bible teaches in Ephesians 5:22-28: "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

For the husband is the HEAD of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church." To have the deep happiness and JOY in your home, you wives must learn to be the "help" to your husbands which God Almighty intended. You must learn to respond to your husband gladly and willingly as long as it is within the will of God. You must learn to make your husband's decisions work! Remember that there is always more than one way to "skin a cat." Yet, when a husband decides on something with which the wife disagrees, how often does she balk and try to subtly make his decision fail?

This is absolutely WRONG!

A truly Christian woman will try to cooperate, to back up and support and make her husband's decisions work! She will not talk back or undermine her husband in front of the children or in ANY OTHER situation. She will lovingly and gladly get on HIS "team" — looking to him as the quarterback and director, and being sincerely thankful and appreciative for his love, protection and support.

This passage continues: "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it" (Eph. 5:25). Just as Jesus Christ cares for, protects and gave His life to save the Church, so every husband should love, protect and nurture his wife — even as his own body (verse 28).

He should be considerate of his wife's wishes — thinking always of the larger good of the entire family in any decision he makes. He must display outgoing concern and LOVE for his wife, and encourage and inspire her to her full development as a Christian woman and do everything he can to bring about her fulfillment and happiness in every way.

Together, then, the husband and wife should teach and train their children in a home based on love, warmth, a spirit of mutual helpfulness and service, and sincere Joy in living the abundant family life! Notice this inspired instruction: "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord" (Ephesians 6:4). From infancy, children should be taught and trained. But they should also be loved, protected, and nurtured. Your willingness to spend TIME with your children — to love them, to play with them and train them is a tremendous responsibility. It will usually make the difference between their having a great feeling of warmth, love and respect for you — or a "distant" unresponsive attitude toward their own parent.

If a husband and wife are willing to spend the proper time and effort with each other, and with their children, they will certainly have an extremely happy "family kingdom." This little unit will teach them lessons of love, happiness and self-discipline which will carry on over into the very responsibilities for which God has placed us on this earth — having a part in His Kingdom in the World Tomorrow.

Here, then, are seven steps to having a truly happy family kingdom:


I. Make Family STUDY a Habit

Teach yourself to sit down regularly with your children — at least a few times each week — and study with them and explain to them important principles of successful living. Read to them sections of the Bible and explain the lessons of life there. Read chapters of the Proverbs — explaining how to apply the wisdom contained in these pages. Go over basic articles from The PLAIN TRUTH magazine with them and inspire them to want to make a success of their lives and build the very character of God. Have father-son or mother-daughter talks with them, telling them about your past life experiences and lessons which you hope they will not have to learn personally by suffering as you did. Teach them positively, also, principles of success and happiness.

Teach your children basic things — honesty and integrity, the value of hard work and productivity. Teach them NEVER to lie nor be deceitful. Teach them to respect and VALUE human life — to be CAREFUL in their own playing, swimming and driving so that you will never have to have a funeral ceremony for your own child! Explain this to them heart-to-heart — and make it meaningful.

Teach your children — as they get up toward the fourth, sixth and eighth grades — to read newspapers and magazines, to be aware of what is going on in the world. Teach them to read worthwhile books — books on geography, history, the biographies and autobiographies of great and successful men, etc. Inspire the right kind of ambition and desire for SUCCESS in your sons and daughters!

Take time to go over with them certain outstanding articles in various magazines and newspapers you may read regarding principles of life and success which you want your children to know. Teach them wisdom and BALANCE in applying these things. Remind them, for instance, that many multimillionaires would give all they had simply to have one happy marriage! Teach them that the grasping, clawing, greedy, competitive way of getting ahead is NOT the real way to permanent happiness and true success. But do — in right balance — inspire them to develop their minds, bodies, personalities and characters so that they may be productive human beings and LEADERS as God directs their lives!

Your little children will never FORGET this kind of teaching, training, love and inspiration. It will be a help and have an impact upon their lives which will last not only through this age — but through eternity. And that is a FACT.