II. Make Family Prayer a Habit
Teach yourself to lead your family in getting on its knees before the Creator God daily. Ideally, this may be done either in the morning before school and work, or in the evening before going to bed. Teach your children to talk to God as a Father. Do NOT stress memorized prayers or stiff, formal approaches to God. Rather, teach your children to talk from their hearts to the one that they can increasingly feel is a "Father" — the One who has made them, loves them, protects them and has in mind their everlasting good.
Follow the approach of Jesus' outline of prayer — falsely called the "Lord's Prayer" — given in Matthew 6:9-13. Help them to learn to ask God for their daily needs, for strength and wisdom and for His blessing and guidance in their daily lives. And in all their praying, teach them to be THANKFUL for living in the blessed circumstances which most of us in the Western World do!
At mealtime, set the example by giving sincere, heartfelt, nonmemorized thanks for the blessings of food and shelter from the Creator God. Occasionally, the mother may wish to have the children themselves lead in prayer at mealtimes — guiding their prayer if they falter.
Then, in the morning or evening family prayer sessions, the father should take the lead and talk to God about the blessings that have been given to the family. Ask Him for help and guidance in the problems and activities that the family faces. And ask also for God's guidance in world affairs, in your nation and for its rulers, and for His special blessing on His Work and His true ministers preparing for the Kingdom of God. Then, the mother should briefly pray and add those things which are fitting, from her heart, and then on to each child in turn — with the father concluding with a brief summary prayer at the end.
In all of this, teach your children the REALITY of the true GOD OF CREATION! Read and go over with them in the family study periods Mr. Ted Armstrong's articles exposing the ridiculous stupidity of evolution and showing the wondrous beauty, design, interdependency and love expressed by God in His creation.
Then teach them the spirit of dedication and service — and to talk from the heart to the Creator as their own Father.
III. Make Family WORK and CHORES a Profitable Habit
Millions of modern children grow up without ever being exposed to the discipline of work and productivity. In their idle hours they develop countless wasteful and foolish habits. And they never develop the habit of work and SUCCESS in this manner.
Teach your children, therefore, the habit of work.
Even in the city, children can be given many things to do if you properly organize them. Your boys can mow the lawn, rake leaves, shovel snow, carry in wood and kindling for the fireplace and even help with the vacuuming, washing and scrubbing of the floors. Your girls can regularly help do the dishes, clean the house, polish the furniture and other similar chores. Each child should be taught to keep his own room clean, to make his own bed daily, and to be responsible for putting things back where they belong and organizing his things throughout the house. This will give each child a sense of responsibility and accomplishment — and may help more than you can imagine in the future success of your children.
IV. Make Family FELLOWSHIP a Habit
Warm and loving family fellowship is a major key in the development of a child's sense of security, a balanced personality and positive approach to life. Every family should talk, laugh and share their lives with each other at all times — and especially at mealtime. Having "family" meals is certainly a great asset in the development of your children. In fact the 128th Psalm, cited earlier, gives the picture: "Thy children like olive plants round about thy table." Here, indeed, is an opportunity to talk over with the children the events of the day.
Ask Johnny: "What did you learn in school today?" And show yourself interested in his answer, in his analysis of the events of his life! Learn to know WHO your children are associating with and what kind of people they are! In a positive way — NOT picking and nagging — guide your children to choose right companionships, to play games in a positive manner without fighting and quarreling, and to develop habits for success in their future lives.
Learn to listen to your children talk! Notice their voice inflection, their personality and the enthusiasm — or lack of it — which they convey. Then try to guide and encourage them toward further development — making sure that you set the example above all else. For children will follow your example more than anything else.
Learn to laugh with and love your children deeply. Share with them the knowledge of their origins — the type of people their great-grandparents and grandparents were, how you yourself grew up, and things that will give their lives a sense of continuity and purpose. Although you should always retain proper dignity as the parent and leader of the child, you can certainly joke and laugh with the child and bring out his personality and give him confidence in the family situation more than in any other!
V. Make Family PLAY and OUTINGS a Habit
Beside just visiting and fellowshipping at the table and around the house, build the habit of playing regularly with your children and sharing with them many hours of good times. Often, children will deeply and long remember the fact that their father used to take them "piggyback" and laugh and romp with them on the floor. This type of activity — kept in right balance and without undue roughness — can establish a sense of rapport and closeness with your children more quickly than almost any other type of activity. Having family card games, Monopoly, croquet, ball games — these are all things to introduce as the children's ages permit.
Then, on weekends and vacations, family picnics, hikes, hunting and fishing trips, camping out or going to the cabin will be an experience your sons and daughters will always remember! In my own life, the dozens of times my father and mother took me down to our cabin on a small river — or on picnics or outings — stand out in my mind as some of the happiest moments of my childhood.
You fathers need to teach your sons to do masculine things — to hunt, to fish, to take care of themselves in the woods and in many other circumstances. Teach your sons to keep their voices low and speak like a man! Teach them to think like a man and to work hard, perspire, accomplish and produce, and not be a coward. Teach them to be self-reliant — not pantywaists or effeminate creatures and candidates for some type of institution!
If you orient your children's play and activities around the family — allowing them to bring in one or two other children of good character on occasion — this alone will prevent a great deal of the tendency toward carousing and juvenile delinquency into which so many unattended children fall. And you will be establishing a closeness and contact with your very heritage which will enable you to guide their lives for many years in the future.
VI. Family TRAINING and DISCIPLINE are Indispensable
Many people train their dogs FAR MORE than they train their own flesh and blood! They will spend literally hours teaching their dog to sit, to heel and to respond to commands. Yet practically no time is given to teaching their own children similar habits of obedience.
In His Word, the living GOD instructs: "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it" (Proverbs 22:6). As a parent you have both the responsibility and the opportunity to teach your children not only obedience and the respect for the rights and property of others, but to teach them personality development, proper culture, and the importance of self-discipline and study. You have in your own hands potential LEADERS of the World Tomorrow! It all depends upon how much time and effort you are willing to put into training them.
"Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him" (Proverbs 22:15). Here God shows us that all children are potentially juvenile delinquents! It is a matter of training and teaching them the right way — then, with complete restraint and self-control, spanking them when they disobey explicit commands and instructions. This does NOT mean to unmercifully BEAT a child in anger. But to quietly, calmly and with complete self-control spank him, in the place which Almighty God provided, until his little mind is truly sorry for his foolishness! This kind of LOVING correction is something that gives a child — all psychologists and psychiatrists to the contrary notwithstanding — a deeper sense of security and balance in his mind and personality than he will ever get by ANY OTHER method! For a further explanation of this tremendously important subject, write immediately for our free booklet: The PLAIN TRUTH About CHILD REARING. This booklet will give you priceless information on disciplining your child GOD's way.
So be sure that you make this matter of family training and discipline an important part of your family's life. Teach your children not only to control themselves physically but to control their tempers — control their thoughts and guide them away from competition, greed, violence and envy, and from foolish daydreaming and lust. Teach them to think positively, to live positively and to have the GOAL of fulfilling their Creator's purpose and preparing for the fantastic life ahead in the World Tomorrow!
VII. Build Family LOYALTY and LOVE
Many months ago, you may have read in your newspapers the account of the young American who left his family, left his home, and left all of the blessings of this society he had always known to go some 8,000 miles away from America to seek and search for his brother who was supposedly taken prisoner or killed by the Viet Cong. I do not know the exact details of this case, but I do know that I was touched by the example of this man's LOYALTY to his lost brother. For this example — at least as far as it goes — is a GODLY thing, and altogether too much lacking in our society today!
For your Bible reveals that God Himself is a FAMILY. There is the Father, and the firstborn Son, Jesus Christ and then all of us have the fantastic opportunity to become born sons of God in the future! Your Bible shows that the Father and the Son deeply LOVE one another — that they share all things together — that they are "one" in mind, personality and character.
So then, as long as family loyalty and love is subordinated to the love and obedience we should give to God Himself — it is a good thing.
Teach Children to Love
Teach your sons and daughters to love one another, to help each other and to remain LOYAL to any member of the family in the way God would have us do. This does NOT mean to take up for a rebellious criminal or to support a sinner against God Himself! But it DOES mean that — even when a brother's attitude is wrong — you will still "help" him by having concern, by praying for him, by appealing to him to listen to reason and wake up while there is yet time. It means that in the event of physical danger or hardship, all the other brothers and sisters should go to the rescue of the one in trouble!
This kind of esprit de corps BINDS a family together in the right way — and protects and preserves the family character and integrity in the way Almighty God intended!
A striking example of this is found even in the life of the "father of the faithful," the prophet Abraham. The account in Genesis 14:1-16 reveals that when Abraham's nephew, Lot, was taken prisoner by some enemy kings of city-states, Abraham came to his rescue.
"And when Abram heard that his brother [technically nephew] was taken captive, he armed his trained servants, born in his own house, three hundred and eighteen, and pursued them unto Dan. . . And he brought back all the goods, and also brought again his brother Lot, and his goods, and the women also, and the people."
Yes, Abraham organized his own private army and charged out to the RESCUE of his young nephew, Lot, and saved his life and his goods (Gen. 14:14-16). For, as Abraham had said, they were brethren — they belonged to the same family — and they had a deep-seated feeling of loyalty and LOVE.
So tell your children this story! Tell the older boys and girls to watch out and take care of the younger. Teach all of them to go to the rescue of the others. And then show them that this concern, kindness and LOVE can grow and overflow to others as well as members of their own family. But this love must be learned first of all and most of all in the home and in the family!
In conclusion, I will point out that the above points provide a MARVELOUS OPPORTUNITY — through family training, study, prayer, work, play and fellowship, loyalty and LOVE — to prevent mental sickness in your children, to insure that they will NEVER become juvenile delinquents or criminals, to give them the keys toward genuine SUCCESS in this life, and the basic guideposts and inspiration to achieve the only real and final success — eternal life and a position of RULERSHIP in the Kingdom of Almighty God!
Remember: "Blessed is everyone that feareth the Lord; that walketh in His WAYS. . . Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table . . . Yea thou shalt see thy children's children, and peace upon Israel" (Psalm 128:1-6)
The great Creator of the heavens and the earth is CONCERNED about your opportunity to build stability and JOY into your home and family life. He has revealed to you "HIS WAYS."
Be sure you do your part and USE THEM — always.